When You Are Tested

It's been a hard day. 

I have been planning on starting school with everyone tomorrow.

So I have a little list of things I need to do to prep and get together.  During the summer everything gets scattered and that's not even counting the disaster the homeschool cabinet has been.  I haven't even had a chance to tackle that.

Daddy has a side job that he is trying to finish so he worked part of the day.

Claire has been very unhelpful.  Any request of her has meant moans and groans. 

Chandler has been whiny, complaining and demanding.

Fiona has been disobedient and defiant.  That two year old independence is working against me.  

Declan has been crying and needy for attention. 

I have a headache and just want to get some stuff done.  It doesn't help that my coping mechanism to stress is disappearing in a book or a TV show.  I am fighting it so hard, especially since it will just make it worse since they won't let me focus on anything and the disruption would not make my mood any better. 

So instead I am going to take a deep breath, eat a piece of dark chocolate and bite my tongue.

I don't like the person I become when I am this stressed.  I especially don't like the parent I become.  I sent Claire and Chandler to their rooms to clean, the few minutes of semi quiet helped.  I worked on some lesson planning and watched an episode of something off Hulu while nursing Declan.  You know what though, I don't HAVE to start school tomorrow.  That's the beauty of homeschooling. 

Our day is what we make it! 

Maybe we won't get all of our work done tomorrow. 

Maybe we'll just go for ice cream instead! 

Maybe we will all wake up refreshed and ready.

Maybe we will declare it a Not-Back-to-School Pajama Day and watch movies all day. 

What I do know is that I need to take a step back and focus on myself and my children and what we all need. 

Blessings in the Bad

One by one my entire family has had a stomach bug this week.  Ick!

On Monday night/Tuesday Nicholas and Declan were throwing up and down for the count.  So pathetic for a little 6 month old!  Poor Nicholas just spent most of the day on the floor with the chills.

The next day Chandler said his stomach hurt and he just laid around most of the day but thankfully did not get too sick.  That same day Fiona slept WAY more then normal.  She woke up her normal time, but then fell asleep on Mom's bed for several hours.  She then had a normal/longish nap and crashed right before bedtime.

On Wednesday night after going to bed Claire came down and told us she had thrown up - in between her bed and night table.  Did I mention we have strawberry shortcake for dessert that night?  Nasty mess.  She continued to throw up several times before I went to bed.  Then I woke up in the middle of the night with whole body shuddering chills and promptly lost it.  Joy.

But I have to say I have an amazing husband.  Due to snow he was working at the workshop which is only about a 1/2 mile from home.  He went to work late because he got everyone together and fed in the morning for me while I laid on the couch pathetically.  Then he came home at lunch and fed everyone and put Fiona down for her nap.  After work he put Declan in the carrier and washed dishes, cleaned up Fiona's messes and fed dinner.

I am blessed to have such a wonderful man. 

Athena

We found Athena under the bedroom couch this morning.  She had passed away sometime during the night.  She was our first baby.  I brought her home before we were even married and Daddy adored her from the moment he saw the little kitten come out from behind me.  She was always sweet and a total lap cat.  One of the few cats that I have known to come when her name was called!  When Claire was a little baby she pulled Athena's fur and Athena turned and bit ME!  :)  She always understood that they were babies and while they weren't her favorites she was always good with them.  She was 13 years old and was definitely getting elderly in the last year, but was still eager for a lap snuggle whenever we finally sat down in the evening.  She was a part of our lives for a very long time and she will be missed dearly. 

Athena at 4 years old

Morning Sickness Vent

I am now 17 weeks pregnant and I am still nauseous every morning.  At least the 24 hour part is edging off except for especially bad days.  I have not been the best mother lately.  The heat and the nausea put me in a lousy mood and I have been so cranky with the kids.  Claire keeps patting me on the arm saying "I hope you feel better tomorrow Mama."  Oh, such guilt. 

And to top it all off my daughter is SO ready for us to start school back up.  Yesterday she pulled out her math book and did a lesson on her own and today I found her at the table doing handwriting pages.  I desperately need to pull everything out and get organized.  Thank God I know it will eventually end - and then I will have a squishy little baby to distract me!  ;)

Oh for the love of ...

I just want to get back into bed and start this day over.

#1 being woken up by The Girl jumping on my bed equals a grumpy mama.

#2 the speech therapist is coming today for Little Man's first session and my house is a mess.

#3 When I tried to take a shower I came out to something on Little Man's face. Turns out The Girl went in my bedroom (where she is not supposed to be) climbed up my dresser (where she is not supposed to touch) and took my nail polish. She then got it on her dress, her brother, my bedroom carpet, Little Man's toys and spilled the rest of it on the kitchen floor. Can I please refer you back to #2?

I spent the next hour trying to clean it all up while The Girl spent that time in her room. Does anyone have tips to get nail polish out of carpet? The nail polish remover is not cutting it ...